For the times when I feel faint

Sometimes, things fall apart. For me, that happens when I wander away from God. It's not easy to go through life solo, and I have no desire to do so. So, several years ago, I got some really good advice. I was having lunch with my friend/mentor Gary. Gary asked me what was happening with my walk with Jesus, and I told him that I felt I'd wandered away, and that I really thought I'd lost the love, the excitement in my relationship with God. It's hard to keep doing something when you don't feel excited about it, which is no excuse. Gary gave me some good advice, advice that has stuck with me since. He said that I should read through Psalms.

Psalm: a sacred song or hymn.

In the Bible, Psalms is the center book. If you take a bible, let it fall open, likely you'll end up looking at a Psalm. It's the longest book in the Bible, and the one with the largest number of authors. Most of the Psalms were written by David, who is remembered as Israel's greatest king. David is described as "A man after God's own heart." Which is what I want to be. David's psalms are the songs he writes to God, love songs, extolling the wonderful things God has done, and writing about his adoration for God. David wrote some of his psalms as acrostics of the Hebrew alphabet, others he wrote to be sung on his way to the Temple to worship. David's psalms talk about the low times in his life, and how God rescued him. That's what I need.

So, I'm reading through Psalms, and something tiny stuck out to me. When I go to "Biblegateway.com", where I read the Bible online, I type in "PSA35" or whatever number I'm on that day (35 was today). PSA is an acronym for "Public Service Announcement." In some ways, Psalms could be seen as Public Service Announcements, they're about God, and about the wondrous things he does for his people. Psalms, like PSA's are meant to be public, they were sung, and performed publicly, with the intention of reminding the nation of their love for God.

So, as I need to be reminded of my love for God, I'm going through the Psalms. What do you do when you're in need of a reminder?

Grandpa has passed

Grandpa died on October 21, 2010. His obituary ran in the New London Day paper. Below is the eulogy I delivered at the funeral.

When I was a child, my grandfather would come to our house to pick me up. He would stand outside his car, parked on Ledyard Street in New London, and whistle. I'd run out of the house, jump into the passenger seat, and we'd head off for ice cream. I still look toward the window when I hear someone whistle like that. My grandfather defined himself by two characteristics: Work and Care. Grandpa was deeply proud of his accomplishments at work, of designing a storage system which saved the company a great deal of money, and of designing a transport system for bromine canisters. After his retirement, grandpa continued to work. He built a garage, and equipped it with a workshop. Some of my fondest childhood memories take place in that workshop. He was quick to offer help to anyone in our family whose house needed repair, or whose lawn needed mowing. I recall many afternoons spent helping Grandpa mow Mary Butler's lawn, or hearing about how he was fixing someone's sink or toilet. In later years, Grandpa turned to driveway sealing, and deck painting, I think in part as a way to use his new pressure washer. We sealed decks and driveways together, often starting as the sun rose.
Grandpa took deep care in both his work, and in his relationships. After my mother died, grandpa was a fixture at our house. Not only handling regular maintenance, but also driving us to school, often taking us out to breakfast on the way. Among my favorite times were spending the night at his house. We would get up early in the morning, and bicycle to Michaels Dairy, where Grandpa would tell me about his first childhood job, delivering milk on one of the Michael's dairy trucks.
My grandfather understood the value of people, and the way people appreciate small things. As the residents of his street aged, Grandpa would show up during snow storms, with his trusty snow blower, and clear their driveways and steps. He said that it was important to take care of the people around you. That was nice, but he went above and beyond, by cutting paths across all the lawns so the mail carrier had a more efficient route, and wouldn’t have to walk through the snow. I met her while cleaning grandpa's house this summer, and she told me how she appreciated that small gesture, how, during those snowy winters, it made her job so much easier.
Nowhere was my grandfather's care more evident than his response to his wife's hospitalization and decline. Grandma was in hospitals as far away as Hartford, a long distance for a man who lived scant miles from his childhood home. My grandfather drove daily to sit with her in the hospital, encouraging her to work hard in rehab, and ensuring the staff provided top notch care.
Later in life, Grandpa spent much of his time in his workshop, sometimes cleaning, sometimes woodworking, one of his favorite things to make were swan shaped planters, which he never sold, but gave away to family and friends. The lions share of my grandfathers' tools, as well as the original swan patterns, now reside in my workshop, and as I use them, I think of him often, and I strive to live up to his example.

Ice Cream Saturdays

When I was a little kid, I used to sleep over at my grandfather's house, usually on a Friday night, but during the summer it might be any night. I'd stay up late with my grandparents, we'd watch Wheel of Fortune, and I'd sit on the floor playing with matchbox cars, or the tiny toy forklift Grandpa got me. I'd sleep in Grandpa's room, (it took me years to ask why my parents shared a room while my grandparents had their own). Sometimes Grandpa's snoring would keep me up. Once I mentioned that his snoring kept me awake, and he started sleeping on the couch.

Grandpa and I were both early risers, so we'd get up early and creep downstairs, he'd remind me to be quiet so as not to wake grandma. We'd eat bowls of Cheerios, then go out to the garage, where we'd get our bikes.

Our route took us up his street, and down the hill, up another hill and down the back side. We'd cross the hospital parking lot, to [redacted] ave. We'd go up a few blocks to [redacted-well known local ice-cream parlor]. When I was little, I'd get an ice-cream cone, later I moved up to milk shakes. Finally, Grandpa introduced me to ice cream sodas. I liked the taste, and I liked the idea of having it like a grown-up, so I always got coffee.

We'd drink our ice-cream sodas, then get back on our bikes to go home. ON our way back down grandpa's street he'd say to me, "Now don't tell grandma that I gave you ice-cream so early, or we'll be in trouble."

Once we put our bikes away, and I watched the electric garage door come slowly down, we'd go in through the kitchen, and find Grandma at the table. She'd be drinking her coffee and having a cigarette as she read the morning paper.

I'd walk up to her, give her a hug and a kiss, and say, "Grandpa gave me ice-cream."

It's totally not fair

In my last post, I talked about how we can know, using the power of logic, that Jesus is the only way to God. In this post, I'd like to talk a bit about the huge imbalance in our relationship with God. First, I should point out another logical premise that I'm working with.

God and I are not equals.

It took me a REALLY long time, and a great deal of soul searching to accept that one. It took years of being angry at God. Years of saying things like, "How dare you?" and "You have no right." But, honestly, it's true, God and I are not equals. Here are a few of the differences between us.


God is righteous, holy and pure. I am not.

 ¹⁷  ‘Can a mortal be more righteous than God?
      Can a man be more pure than his Maker? (Job 4:17, New King James Version)

 ⁵ Gracious is the LORD, and righteous;
         Yes, our God is merciful. (Psalm 116:5, New King James Version)

 ¹⁰ As it is written: 

     “ There is none righteous, no, not one;
   ¹¹ There is none who understands;
      There is none who seeks after God.
       (Romans 3:10-11, New King James Version)

God Knows everything.

¹³ Nothing in all the world can be hidden from God. Everything is clear and lies open before him, and to him we must explain the way we have lived. (Hebrews 4:13, New Century Version)

God is all powerful. (Omnipotent means all powerful. Omni=All, Potent=Powerful)

 ⁶ And I heard, as it were, the voice of a great multitude, as the sound of many waters and as the sound of mighty thunderings, saying, “Alleluia! For the Lord God Omnipotent reigns! (Revelation 19:6, New King James Version)

Let's get something out of the way, I doubt anyone would argue this, but for the sake of clarity, I am not all-powerful. Though I am very smart, I do not know everything, and though I think of myself as a decent guy, I come nowhere near righteous or holy.

God and I are not equals, and on every measure imaginable, God is far above/more/better than me. So, in relating to one another, I have a serious problem. The God of the universe doesn't have to listen to me. God doesn't have to do what I want, and doesn't have to care what's best for me. But God does listen, and God does care. Here's how we can know.


1. God sent his Son Jesus, who died for me. (For more on this, please see my previous post, or go to the source, and read the Bible).

It's pretty incredible that the God of the Universe cared enough to send Jesus, it's very hard to believe that He did so because He doesn't care. If Jesus really came and died for us, that is undeniable proof that God cares.

2. God's provision didn't end at Jesus.

As if Jesus wasn't enough, God has allowed us to come to him directly in prayer. Though, that brings up a bit of a problem. Not being all knowing, I don't always know what to pray. Not being all powerful, I don't have the ability to make my own prayers come true. God, however, has foreseen and solved this problem. Before we go on though, think about how incredible that is for a moment. Before Jesus, we humans were essentially in an un-winnable war against God. Sin is, at its heart, a rebellion against God, and we humans are amazingly determined rebels. God set up the system of sacrifice, so there could be some peace between God and Man, but it wasn't enough, since we kept breaking the truce. God sent his Son, and set up a truce that couldn't be broken. Then he said that even though I am such a rebel, I'm allowed to come to Him and ask for things. And He'll answer. Because He loves me. (I'll be writing more on this later, of that you can be sure).

God has set up two helps for me. As mentioned above, I don't always know what to pray, and I'm sure that I frequently pray for the wrong thing entirely. With a limited view, and a selfish nature, I'm not always interested in what's good for me, and rarely interested in what's best for me. I do however have a firm handle on what might be fun for me. Bad for me, but fun. With that in mind, my prayers, the specific things I ask for, might be somewhat suspect. So God, knowing that I would have this problem, has provided me with some help. First, the bible says that we have Jesus, who intercedes for us with God. Jesus speaks to God on our behalf.

 ¹⁹ People may be corrected while in bed in great pain;
       they may have continual pain in their very bones.
 ²⁰ They may be in such pain that they even hate food,
       even the very best meal.
 ²¹ Their body becomes so thin there is almost nothing left of it,
       and their bones that were hidden now stick out.
 ²² They are near death,
       and their life is almost over.
 ²³ "But there may be an angel to speak for him,
       one out of a thousand, who will tell him what to do.
 ²⁴ The angel will beg for mercy and say:
       'Save him from death.
       I have found a way to pay for his life.'
 ²⁵ Then his body is made new like a child's.
       It will return to the way it was when he was young.
 ²⁶ That person will pray to God, and God will listen to him.
       He will see God's face and will shout with happiness.
       And God will set things right for him again.
 ²⁷ Then he will say to others,
       'I sinned and twisted what was right,
       but I did not receive the punishment I should have received. (Job 33:19-27, New Century Version)

  ⁵ For there is one God and one Mediator between God and men, the Man Christ Jesus, (1 Timothy 2:5, New King James Version)

 ⁵ For there is one God and one Mediator between God and men, the Man Christ Jesus, (1 Timothy 2:5, New King James Version)

Not only do I have God's son speaking to God on my behalf, but Jesus also provided the Holy Spirit, the third person of the Trinity. The Holy Spirit prays for me.

 ²⁶ Also, the Spirit helps us with our weakness. We do not know how to pray as we should. But the Spirit himself speaks to God for us, even begs God for us with deep feelings that words cannot explain. (Romans 8:26, New Century Version)

To recap, God the Father loves me so much that he sent His Son to die in my place. That same Son, resurrected from the dead, now stands as a mediator between me and God. God himself, in the person of the Holy Spirit acts as an advocate for me. This system isn't fair, it's skewed wildly in my favor.

This brings us to a bit of a puzzle. If God loves me so much, if Jesus stands between me and God, mediating between us, and if the Holy Spirit advocates before God on my behalf, why do I need this system at all? It's all in my favor, what's the point of such a system, when everything is for my benefit. Since it's all in my favor, why do I need a mediator and an advocate? Who is against me here? Looking around, I think we can see that there's only one party not working on my behalf.

Me.

I have a God who loves me and works to my benefit, a mediator who gave his life to save mine, and an advocate who knows what to ask for when I can't even figure out what's going on. I need all this help because I'm incredibly self-destructive. The only one in the room not working for my benefit is me.

 ²³ For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord. (Romans 6:23, New King James Version)

The wages of sin is death, the gift of God is life. I'm busily working on death, while God is desperately trying to offer me life.

I'm not alone in this, it's the same for you too. God wants very badly to give you life. God has gone to great lengths, and to incredible trouble to offer you life, all you have to do is accept it. God has set up a system deeply weighted in your favor, because everything we do is working against our own interests.

God and I are totally not equals, and this system is totally not fair.

All roads lead to Rome. Only Jesus leads to God.

Recently, in my Bible study, we came upon the following verse.

 ⁶ Jesus said to him, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me. (John 14:6, New King James Version)

If you've never come across it before, this is a verse that bothers a lot of people. The exclusivity of it "gets" folk. It's bothersome that Jesus says he is the only way to God. It's problematic especially if you're not a christian, because Jesus has not left any room for you to say, "Well, what works for you may not work for me."

Jesus doesn't leave any wiggle room here, and although that can be uncomfortable to think about, it does make logical sense. Christianity is unlike any other religion, in that rather than requiring some entrance fee from us, God has made atonement for our sins Himself. Let's look fore closely at Jesus claim here.

"No one comes to the Father except through me."

Now, to have this talk, I'm working off three distinct logical premises.
1. Jesus was a real man who lived.
2. Jesus actually said this.
3. Jesus was God's son, who willingly, and at God's behest, served as an atoning sacrifice for our sin on our behalf.
We can talk about proving those premises later (read: in different posts), but what comes next will be based on them.

God exchanged His son's life for mine. Now, I don't have kids, but I know several parents. I used to volunteer for a support group for grieving children. I've know several families who have had children die. It's painful for the brothers and sisters, but that's nothing compared to the pain of the parents. It's the kind of pain that tears apart a marriage, that wounds relationships, and leaves an empty look in a parent's eyes, like a part of their heart is missing.

God, being God, knows everything. God knew beforehand what he was doing when he asked Jesus to die for our sins. Jesus knew what was coming (torture, pain, death, separation from God). We know this because of what he prayed in the garden the night he was arrested.

 ³⁹Going a little ahead, he fell on his face, praying, "My Father, if there is any way, get me out of this. But please, not what I want. You, what do you want?"  (Matthew 26:39, The Message)

and

 ⁴²He then left them a second time. Again he prayed, "My Father, if there is no other way than this, drinking this cup to the dregs, I'm ready. Do it your way."  (Matthew 26:42, The Message)

 Note: In this context, the cup is full of God's wrath about our sin, it's what must be consumed in order for us to have a relationship with God.

Even knowing what was coming, Jesus went forward with the plan. God's pain was doubled, not only would Jesus die, not only would God not intervene to stop it, God himself would be the one to kill his own son. A few minutes later a crowd of people showed up in the Garden to arrest Jesus. Peter tried to defend his master, drawing his sword, and managing to sever the ear of the high priests's servant. Jesus response:

 ^52-54Jesus said, "Put your sword back where it belongs. All who use swords are destroyed by swords. Don't you realize that I am able right now to call to my Father, and twelve companies—more, if I want them—of fighting angels would be here, battle-ready? But if I did that, how would the Scriptures come true that say this is the way it has to be?"  (Matthew 26:52-54, The Message)

Note: Company here is translated Legion elsewhere. A legion at the time was 5,120 soldiers. 12 Legions=61,440 Angels (we'll round it off to 60,000)

Can't you just picture it? God has assembled the armies of Heaven, ready to send in to the rescue, Angelic special forces commandos, ready to shock & awe the crowd. Ready to extract Jesus and slaughter everyone who deserves it.

You and I deserve it. God knew that. Jesus knew that, and so, rather than call on 60,000 angels, rather than summon the army standing at the ready, He told Peter to put away his sword. He healed the high priest's servant, and went quietly with the mob.

Now we come back to our central point, Jesus says there is no way to the Father except through Him. Jesus gave his life for us. The Father killed his own son in our place, had there been some other way, we can be confident that these things would have been unnecessary, that Jesus would have prayed in the garden, "But Father, couldn't we just direct them to [alternate path here]." If Jesus is the only way to heaven, his sacrifice is noble, a great gift from a loving God to an undeserving people. If Jesus is not the only way, his sacrifice is the cruel act of a brutal God.

Jesus is the only way to God. No other explanation makes sense.

 

More Budgetary Shenanigans

Now, another year, I had some money left over in the budget, and I decided that what we ought to get was a new tractor for the yard. See, we had all these cars to move around, and we really needed a tractor with air brakes.

The Company had this department, that handled moving equipment around, so if you needed something, instead of buying it from outside the company, first you checked if they had an extra one somewhere else. Now this guy I called, he really wanted to get rid of this tractor, but it wasn't what we wanted. He told me that if I didn't take it, then he'd make sure that I never got the right thing. Well, I figured that it was better not to let him push me around, and frankly, whether I took it or not, it was the wrong kind of tractor, and it wouldn't work for what we needed, so I told him that we weren't going to take it. Well, that made him real mad.

This fool threatened to call the plant manager, and I told him to just go ahead and call. The plant manager called me a little while later, and asked me what was going on, I explained that the guy was trying to push something on us that we didn't want, and that he was being a real jackass to boot. So, I ended up winning, we got the right kind of tractor, one with the power and brakes that we needed, and that guy got chewed out by his boss. Turns out that he was trying to make his end of the year quota, and just wanted to move whatever he could, he didn't care a whit about what people really needed.

Taking care of your employees

Well, I went to work at [redacted], and I worked there for upwards of 30 years, I like the job too. I handled the shipping department, and eventually, I got promoted to be the Warehouse manager. I liked having guys work for me, and I liked taking care of the people under me. So, this one winter, there was a surplus in the budget, and I knew that I had to spend it down.

"Why did you have to spend it? why not save?" I asked.

Well, see, if you don't spend your whole budget, then the company thinks that they gave you too much money, then what happens is that next year, when you might need that money, they don't give it to you. So you have to spend your entire budget. So, I talked to the guys in the warehouse. We didn't have enough to get any kind of equipment, just a few bucks were left in the account, so I talked to them, and I took that money, and I bought them all work coats and work gloves. Nice warm, tough, work clothes. That way, all of them, all winter, were nice an warm. They loved it.

See, whenever you can, it's important to take good care of your employees, you want them to know that you understand that they have a hard job, and that you'll make it easier if you can. That, and also, there's the fact that they appreciate that you recognize them. That helps them to put in a harder days work, which makes everybody happy. You ought to remember that, that you want to take good care of the people under you.

Don't work with Dad

Well, being home from the army, I needed a job. There weren't that many jobs around, lots of guys were coming home from the army, and all of them wanted jobs too. My father was a forman for a [construction company], and he offered me a job. So, I told him I'd think about it.

Now, my father liked to work, and all of my brothers had gone to work with him, and so I asked them what it was like working for the old man. They all told me not to take that job. My father, he never wanted anybody to think that he was easier on his sons than he was on his crew, so he made them all come in an hour early, and stay an hour late, and they had to do it off the clock. That's why I ended up getting a job with [redacted].

Sharing the faith

I find it scary to share my faith. I am worried about looking weird, and being uncomfortable. Now, you may be thinking, "But Geoff, you write this blog." Yes, and I don't have to see any of you face to face. I can sit back, safe, and feel like I'm sharing my faith. Honestly, it's a pretty cowardly move.

Which is why I was so shocked by the verse I read this week in Philemon. Philemon is a personal letter the apostle Paul wrote to a man named, Philemon. Paul's letter is about a run away slave named Onesimus. Paul's letter tells Philemon about Onesimus' care for Paul, how he had ministered to Paul when Paul was in need. Paul asks Philemon to free Onesimus. I don't read Philemon often. Philemon's themes are good ones, but I tend to think that since I don't own slaves, and since I won't be owning slaves, that I won't find much in Philemon. This verse I found was a double shock. One quick note for verses in Philemon. It's a very short book, so short that there are no chapters, so when I write Philemon 1, what I mean is the first verse, not the first chapter.

"I pray that you may be active in sharing your faith, so that you will have a full understanding of every good thing we have in Christ." Philemon 6.

Paul is saying here that part of experiencing every good thing in Christ, is sharing one's faith. So, I guess that I have some work to do. Have a good weekend, and look forward to more posts soon.

A point I sometimes have difficulty remembering

I love politics, I love the intrigue, I like to follow the exploits of my favorite politicians. I have a friend who lives in Tennessee, we haven't seen one another in almost ten years, yet we talk on the phone weekly to discuss the latest goings on in Washington D.C. I like to read the New York Times and listen to NPR's political coverage. From time to time, I call or write to my elected representatives to express an opinion.

As a person who has opinions, I sometimes have trouble separating my thoughts about a law or policy from my thoughts about its proponents. God uses politics, and politicians. The Bible is filled with examples of God using both godly and ungodly leaders to benefit His people. I've been reading the book of Ezra recently. Ezra starts out with King Cyrus deciding to rebuild the temple to God in Jerusalem, and sending Ezra to oversee the project. Now, it's important to note that this King Cyrus was not a follower of God. He was hoping to gain political power, and what we would call "karma" for being nice to every god he could find. From his perspective, the people of Israel may have been a cheap nation to please, because unlike their neighbors, with only one God, they had only one temple to build. Similarly, the book of Nehimiah tells about King Artaxerxes allowing, and even funding the construction of a wall around Jersualem, much to the consternation of Jersualem's neighbors. In these two instances, God uses a pagan king to benefit his people.

Politics has a terrible way of fracturing people. It seems like every year we move farther away from respectfully disagreeing with the opposition, and closer to disdaining them. This may have been why Jesus decided not to get into politics. The crowds, who followed Jesus several times intended to make Him their king. In the political sense. Jesus chose instead to run away (John 6:15).

As Christians, our response to people around us is in part, influenced by these two verses:

"If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone." Romans 12:18
"Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another." John 13:34

Personally, I sometimes have a hard time in applying those to the politicians I so like to watch, but even harder than that, I can have a hard time remembering this. No matter their party, and no matter their political or religious outlook, God has placed that person in that role. Moreover, God has placed that person for my benefit. Here's what I mean, Paul writes in his letter to the Romans,

"The authorities that exist have been established by God" Romans 13:1c
"For [the ruler] is God's servant, to do you good." Romans 13:4a

As I continue to grow in Christ, I'm working hard to remember that. When I'm shouting at the radio, or laughing along with the Daily Show, it's sometimes tough for me to recall that God has put politicians into their roles for my benefit, and that this extends to those who I don't agree with as well as to those I do. This also demands a response. As christians, it is our job to pray for our leaders, both for those we like, and those we dislike. It's in this spirit that I'm trying to look at politics through a new lens, approaching it not through outrage, but through prayer.

A more common sort of provision

Sometimes, I read the bible and think, "Where are all the miracles today?" Now, I know, there are miracles every day, some are the big obvious kind we read about in the four gospels. I think that most of God's provision isn't through miracles. I think that mostly it's through a quieter sort of intervention. God exercises a quality which is lauded in the book of Proverbs. Planning.

In his heart, a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps. Proverbs 16:9

God sometime provides though big miracles, but God regularly provides through good planning. Take for instance the story of Joseph. Joseph was sold into slavery by his brothers, but God had a better plan. God planned to put Joseph into the second highest position in Egypt, and through him, preserve the nation of Israel during a 7 year famine. Here, we see Joseph talking telling his brothers what has happened to him.

Then Joseph said to his brothers, "Come close to me." When they had done so, he said, "I am your brother Joseph, the one you sold into Egypt! And now, do not be distressed, and do not be angry with yourselves for selling me here, because it was to save lives that God sent me ahead of you... God sent me ahead of you to preserve for you a remnant on earth, and to save your lives by a great deliverance. Genesis 45:4-5, 7

My two favorite books in the Bible are Ezra and Nehemiah. I like them because I can identify with the main characters. Ezra and Nehemiah are both young men, who are good at management and administration. I am a young man who is good at management and administration. I also like them, because though God's hand is clearly at work in both stories, there aren't any obvious miracles. Instead, God planned to put each of them into the right place, at the right time. He also gave them the talents they would need to succeed.

In Ezra's case, his mission was to rebuild the temple in Jerusalem. The temple had been destroyed when the Chaldeans invaded. This was a common practice. There were two benefits to destroying a temple. First, temples, including God's temple in Jerusalem, were constructed using valuable materials. The temple had gold inlaid between the stones, as well as man gold articles within. There was also a psychological component. The invading army was saying that they not only conquered a nation's military, they also conquered a nation's gods. This demoralized the local people, and tended to decrease the chances of a revolt.

A few years after Ezra began work on the temple, some men came to Nehemiah, and told him that the wall around Jerusalem was badly broken, and that as a result, the people of the city lived in constant fear. At the time, a city's best defense against attack was a good strong wall. The wall would have gates, where commerce could be conducted, but at night, the gates would be closed. The wall protected the city from invading armies, and from bands of robbers who might want to come in at night and do harm. Without a wall, there was nowhere safe in the city, though the outlying houses were more vulnerable at night. There was also a psychological component here, the city could look at the wall, and think, "We have a good wall, and so we'll be safe." Without a good wall, the city would be a laughingstock to its neighbors, an object of ridicule, unable to defend itself. Hearing that the city wall is in ruins, Nehemiah prepares to go to the king, and ask leave to go fix it. He prays to God, calling on the promises God has made, that if His people will turn from their wickedness, that God will restore their homeland. Nehemiah ends his prayer this way.

'O Lord, let your ear be attentive to the prayer of your servant, and to the prayers of your servants who delight in revering your name. Give your servant success today by granting him favor in the presence of this man.' I was cupbearer to the king. Nehemiah 1:11

Note that last line. Nehemiah notes, after his prayer, that he was cupbearer to the king. A cupbearer wasn't just someone who carried about the king's cup. It was a deeply trusted position. The cupbearer was in charge of what the king drank. He was tasked with ensuring that no one poisoned the king by slipping something into his drink. The cupbearer literally held the king's life in his hands, and as such, was a very close official. The cupbearer, because of how often he was called upon, was always near the king, and was privy to all sorts of secret information. God had put Nehemiah into a lofty and trusted position, and Nehemiah intended to use that position to further God's kingdom.

Nehemiah is successful before the king, and obtains not only permission to go to Jerusalem, but also the king agrees to supply the raw materials for the wall. Nehemiah encounters other difficulties throughout the wall rebuilding process, and I encourage you to read all about them. The point here though, is that God's provision came not in the form of a big miracle, but instead through placing the right person in the right position. In our lives, God's provision also takes this form. That's not to say that God doesn't perform miracles for us, but it is to say that if you're looking for a miracle, and don't find one, that's no reason to think that God isn't working. At the same time, this begs a question, understanding that God has gone through the trouble of planning to put you into your position, be that executive, doctor, social worker, or janitor. What does God intend you to do while you're there?

[Image Credit: Meknes, Morocco City Gate]

Coming home to work

Now, you know that I like to work. I got out of the army, and I headed for home, just waiting to get a job and get to work. I got home, and after a little bit, my father, your great grandfather, came to me, he said, "There's a guy on my crew, he got hurt, and the crew is going out to cut some wood on his land. He heats his house with a wood stove, and since he can't cut the wood himself, we're going to make sure that he has enough to get through the winter. Want to come help?"

So, I said, "Sure pop." Now, what you have to know, is that my father was a lumberjack up in Canada before he came down here. He used to work in the lumber camps, with his brothers, and the come home only a couple of times a year. After he had done that for a bit, he taught himself how to read blueprints. He only had a fifth grade education, and he taught himself how to read blueprints, he was no dummy. He got a job working as a foreman, in marine construction.

Well, the day came, and we went out to the guy's land. It was me, my father, and my brothers, along with the rest of my father's work crew. Now, I was young, in good shape, I had just got out of the army, and so I said to my old man, "Pop, today, I'm going to show you how to work." So, we went to work. We took a two man cross-cut saw and started on the trees.

"Two man crosscut saw?" I asked

Yeah, it's a big saw, so big that you need two people to use it, one guy on each end, pulling back and forth. We didn't have chainsaws back then. So, my father and I went to work with one, him on one side, me on the other. Well, we went on for a few hours, and it came time for lunch. I was tuckered out. I don't think I've worked that hard in a long time. I flopped out on the ground exhausted, figuring that I'd rest up during lunch, and then get back to work. Well, I looked up from the ground, and there was my father, handling that saw on his own. He just looked at me and laughed. He said, "You just go ahead and show me how to work." That old man could work like nobody else.

[image credit: fine-tools.com]

God's version of multiplication

God uses "different" math. It seems that God's plan for us doesn't so much include addition, as multiplication. Recently, my wife and I read through the book of Ruth, where I was struck by the way in which God responded to Ruth's commitment. Here's a quick synopsis of Ruth:




There was a famine in Israel, a man named Elimelech took his sons and his wife Naomi to the neighboring nation of Moab, because Moab had food. The sons married women from Moab. Elimelech and his sons died, leaving Naomi with her two daughters-in-law, one of whom was named Ruth. None of them had jobs, and so none of them had food. Naomi decided to go back to Israel, because the famine had ended. Ruth went with Naomi, saying:

"Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God. Where you die I will die, and there I will be buried. May the LORD deal with me, be it ever so severely, if anything but death separates you and me." Ruth 1:16b-17

Naomi lets Ruth comes with her, they settle in Bethlehem, which is where Elimelech's family lives. They're poor, and so Ruth goes out to the fields gathering grain, where she meets Boaz, who eventually is so impressed with the kind of woman she is, that he marries her.

Now, that's a very quick summary of the book of Ruth, and I strongly suggest that instead of the cliff-notes version, you go for the real thing. It's quite short, only four chapters, but too long for me to reproduce the whole thing here. That being said, God, like Boaz, seems somewhat impressed by Ruth. When Ruth and Naomi are living in Bethlehem, all the people of the town are impressed by Ruth. She doesn't complain, she works hard. She takes care of her mother-in-law, because she thinks that's the right thing to do. Moreover, she has decided that she will follow Naomi's God.

This is the kind of commitment God is looking for, and when he finds it, he acts. In the short term, God acted in Ruth's life by introducing her to Boaz. Boaz is a good man. Boaz sees Ruth working in his field, and asks the foreman about her. Having heard a good report about her, that she works hard, that she doesn't steal, Boaz says to Ruth:

"My daughter, listen to me, don't go into another field, and don't go away from here. Stay here with my servant girls. Watch the field where the men are harvesting, and follow along after the girls. I have told the men not to touch you, and whenever you are thirsty, go and get a drink from the water jars the men have filled." Ruth 2:8-9

To quickly take this apart, Boaz says to Ruth, you can stay here, nobody will hurt you, this was a serious concern, a woman alone, out in the fields, was open to all sorts of things happening, from an accident to an assault. Second, he says, my protection will extend to you when they're done with this field, you should follow my workers to their next worksite, and you'll be able to continue to gather food there. Also, when you're thirsty, you can have some of their water.

At lunch, Boaz offers Ruth some food, and tells her that she's welcome to the company lunch that he provides. It's important to note two cultural things here. First, Ruth didn't work for Boaz. She wasn't an employee, and what she gathered from his field wouldn't benefit him economically, instead, she was taking the "gleaning", the stalks of grain that the harvesters missed. She would be taking the grain home and either eating it, or selling it for household necessities. Second here is that eating together is a serious thing in the middle-east. It's not like having coffee here, it's more like staying at somebody's house for the weekend. Boaz is saying to Ruth that even though she's not there to benefit the company, she can be part of the company for all other purposes.

A quick update on the score. Ruth has given her life to God ("your God will be my God.")

God has provided Ruth with a safe place to gather food.

God has also introduced Ruth to Boaz, who has provided daily lunch and cool water.

Ruth heads home from her day's work, having gathered a large amount of grain (about 5 gallons), Naomi is impressed, because this is more than would normally have been expected. (Boaz had told his workers to leave a bit more grain than usual in the fields, so she could gather it.) Naomi asks whose field Ruth worked in, and is happy to hear it was Boaz, he's a relative of Elimelech's, and he's known in town as a good man.

A little time passes, Ruth continues to gather grain in Boaz's fields. Enough time has passed in fact that they've moved on to a new crop, and they're harvesting Barley. While I'm not a farmer, I understand that Barley is harvested after wheat. Naomi tells Ruth that she should ask Boaz if he's interested in marrying her. Boaz is single, Ruth is single, Boaz might like Ruth. So, Naomi tells Ruth to get dressed up, and sneak up to the place where they're threshing the barley, and have a chat with Boaz. Ruth does everything Naomi tells her. 

"I will do everything you say," Ruth answered. Ruth 3:5

It works, Boaz is totally into her. But, there's a little problem, see, there's another relative, who is ahead of Boaz for the right to buy Elimelech's property. The property carries the family line, and it's owner will be expected to marry Ruth, and with her, produce an heir for Elimelech. This gets a bit complicated, but it was important that a person's name not dissapear from the history of the Nation of Israel, and the way that was organized, was to ensure that a person's name was always on his property, even if he was dead. So, Boaz heads into town the next day, and talks to the guy. The guy is interested in the property, but not interested in Ruth. He doesn't want any kids he has with Ruth to get his property, because he already has kids, who have their eye on the family farm. So, Boaz and Ruth are in the clear.

Boaz and Ruth get married.

Score update: Ruth gives her life to God.

God gives Ruth an income.

God gives Ruth a good reputation in her town.

God introduces Ruth to Boaz.

Ruth and Boaz get married, meaning that Ruth goes from being poor, to being rather rich.

Boaz and Ruth get pregnant (I think Ruth handled most of the being pregnant part of this), and they have a son. They name their son "Obed" (This name won't be in the running when I become a parent). Obed grows up and has a son (again, mostly his wife's doing), named Jesse. Jesse grows up and has several sons, the youngest of whom is named David. David grows up and becomes King of Israel, and is remembered today, something like 3,000 years later, as the greatest king Israel ever had. David has sons, who have children, who have children. One of those children, several generations later is named Jesus. Jesus is also God. Jesus grows up and dies for our sins.

Final Score: Ruth has given her life to God. In turn God has improved Ruth's immediate circumstances by putting her into a relationship with a loving husband. God has also put Ruth into the lineage of his own son, Jesus. This is a pretty huge honor (I can't imagine one bigger). Ruth's great grandson becomes King. Several generations later, one of her descendants is the King of Kings. In my opinion, God didn't so much as add to Ruth's life, as multiply it.

Home is where the heart is Part 4: The guts of a house

I did a lot of things myself on this house. I went down to [local lumber company] and picked out the cabinets. They had a set that somebody had ordered, but then didn't want, so I picked 'em up for half price. Pretty good deal too, I had to cut a couple down to size, but that's no big thing. So, I got the cabinets. But, the real work was doing the plumbing and the electrical for the house.

Now, plumbing's not that hard, you just have to know what you're doing. It's a lot easier to do when you put in all the pipes before the walls are covered in drywall, that way, you can see everything you're doing. So, that's what I did, I ran the pipes, and did all the soldering. I put them all in, so that when the walls were up, I could just connect up the sinks and shower, and I'd be all set. Now, the plumbing, it's not so hard, you just make sure that the pipes don't leak. But, the electrical, that's another trick.

I didn't want to do all the wiring, because I didn't really know what I was doing, and I didn't want the house to burn down. So, what I did was I talked to my brother the electrician. He told me that I should run all the wires, and that he'd hook them up. So, that's what I did, took me a couple of days, but I ran all the wires through the house, got them where they needed to go, then he came down one day, and checked my work. He said that they all looked good, and he hooked them up to the fusebox. By the time I built my garage, I was good enough that all I needed him to do was check my work, I did all the hooking up myself.

on Thirst

I had the flu this weekend. There is little in life I hate more than throwing up, but almost worse than that is the thirst. The dangerous part of the flu is dehydration, which I got to experience, but, thanks to God's grace and my wife's care, not to a dangerous level. The problem of course was that I couldn't drink much, because I couldn't keep it down. So, instead, I had to endure the thirst. It made me think of this verse:

"On the last, and greatest day of the feast, Jesus stood up and said in a loud voice, 'If anyone is thirsty, let him come to me and drink.'" John 7:37

No one in the crowd should have been physically thirsty. It was the last day of a multi-day feast. People had been eating and drinking as much as they could manage for several days. There was no reason for anyone to need anything more, yet Jesus says, "If anyone is thirsty..."

Jesus describes himself several times in scripture as "living water," He tells people that if they drink of him, that they will never again thirst. By this he means spiritual thirst, not the physical sort I was enjoying. In that context though, I was thinking about Jesus choice of that metaphor, when I was so thirsty, there was nothing that occupied my mind so much as the thought of drinking a glass of cool, clear water. I couldn't stop thinking about it, I was consumed by it. In the same way, I think, Jesus is pointing out to a thirsty world that even though they don't realize what they want, they're looking for Him. This morning, with my breakfast, I drank several cool, delicious glasses of water. They were wonderful. Sitting on my table, illuminated by the sunlight coming in through the front window, the water looked beautiful. I think that's how Jesus wants us to see Him. That He is able to quench our thirst, that He is pleasing to the eye, and good for the body. Better yet, unlike the religions that the world offers, He is alive, and once you've had Him, you'll never want for anything else again.

Speaking of which, I'm off to have another glass of water.

Home is where the heart is. Part 3: Putting up the walls

Now, like I said, I used to work pretty late into the night. I'd work until the sun went down, then I'd finish by the headlights of my car. My brother [the carpenter] would come over, and he'd check my work. One night, I had been in a hurry, but I'd finished this whole wall. Well, I was pretty proud of myself, until he stopped over to check my work. He took one look at it, and said, "You gotta tear that all apart and do it again."

It looks good, what's wrong with it?

So he says, "It's not square."

"Square" I asked Grandpa?

Yeah, square. See, all the corners have to be square... uhh, right angles. If they're not, then the whole thing can fall down. Carpenters have this tool, called a square, which they use to check everything. A square, it looks like a big metal "L" and you hold it up on all the angles, you can tell if they're the right angle, and if they're not, then when you put some weight onto the structure, it'll fall down. That wall I made, the studs weren't square with the top. It was only off by a little bit, but a roof weighs a lot, and if I didn't fix it, then the house would fall down before I got finished with it. So my brother explained all of that to me, and the next night, I took the whole wall apart and started doing it again, started doing it right this time.

Grandpa went over and patted the front wall of his house, "See, it hasn't fallen down yet, and it's been up more than 40 years."

In which I point out that God loves you

In my ongoing series regarding Christianity, I thought that it might be time to discuss sin. Yes, sin is real. Yes, there are activities which are sins, and there are activities which are not sins. Yes, this does mean that I am judging your behavior, and that you are free to judge mine. Sin has consequences. GK Chesterton wrote in Orthodoxy that sin is the easiest part of Christianity to prove. We cannot prove the resurrection, though there is good reason to believe that it happened. We cannot prove that God made the world. Proving sin is easy, since it is manifestly true.

What is sin? Sin is anything we think, say, or do, which takes us further from relationship with God. Please note the word relationship. One of the ways in which Christianity differs from other religions is in being a relationship between a person and God. It's not one way, it's two way. I relate to God, God relates to me. You relate to God, God relates to you. Much like in any other relationship, we have the ability to make the relationship better, and we have the ability to make the relationship worse. I am married to a wonderful woman, whom I love deeply. If I say something insensitive, or I agree to do something then don't follow through, that creates an injury to the relationship. This injury must be dealt with, or it will fester. As such, I try to make a point of apologizing when I have wronged my beloved wife. Just as in my marriage (which God uses as a picture of what our relationship with Him should look like), there are consequences to my sin. When I hurt my wife, the apologize, she decides to forgive me. This does not ameliorate the fact that she has been hurt, and depending on the injury, may take a bit of time to heal. In our relationship with God, the consequences of sin are a bit higher.

"For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus, our Lord." Romans 6:23

The result of sin in our relationship with God is that we die. We earn death by sinning. Just like my wife's forgiveness helps our relationship to heal, God's forgiveness allows our relationship with Him to continue. However, there remains that pesky problem of death. See, someone has to die. The debt has to be paid. Which is why God sent Jesus. God wanted us to enjoy eternal life, and moreover, to have that eternal life with Him, but to do so, the debt we had racked up through sin had to be satisfied. Jesus paid that debt. With His life.

That's an incredibly high price. Honestly, that's much more than I would have been willing to pay, especially understanding that I continue to sin, I continue to be a jerk to God on an almost daily basis. Looking objectively at this for a moment, God got a rather bad deal. God doesn't look objectively at this. Instead, God decided that his love for me, and for you, was sufficient that he was willing to pay the highest imaginable price for us. God traded his perfect son's life, in order to save my wretched life. And moreover, He still thinks it was worth it. The book Jesus Freaks (and I'm quoting from memory, so this might be slightly off) contains the story of a Colonel in the Russian military during the cold war. This Colonel found himself in the room with a Christian one day. This christian shared the good news of Jesus with the Colonel, who decided to become a Christian himself. His prayer, as I recall, went something like this, "Dear God, Thank you for saving me. If I were you, and you were me, I never would have saved you, but you have saved me. You must be a very good fellow. Thank you."

God is indeed a very good fellow. God has paid an unimaginable price for you and me. The great news of it is this. God knew what he was getting. God knew that he was getting sinful people. God isn't surprised by the sin in your life. God has never said, "Fix what's wrong in your life, and come to me." Instead, God has said, and continues to say, "Come to me, and together we'll work on what's wrong."

I need to take a quick moment out for a vocabulary lesson before we continue.
Justice: Getting what you deserve. eg. You steal a car, you must return the car, make reparations, and spend some time in jail.
Mercy: Not getting what you deserve. eg. You steal a car, you must return the car, and you are then free and clear with no further repercussions.
Grace: Getting what you don't deserve. eg. You steal a car, you are then given a car dealership.

Justice for us would be the aforementioned death. God interacts with us using Grace. Note, you aren't expected to clean up your life, God doesn't require that you have everything right. Instead, God says:

"For by grace you have been saved, through faith - and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God - not by works, so that no one can boast." Ephesians 2:8-9

Broken down, here is the great part. God paid a great deal so that you don't have to suffer the consequences of sin. God did this because he wants to have a relationship with you. God did not do this so that when you decide that you want to know him, he can say, "Nope, you're not good enough." God knows you. God knows all your crap. God knows all my crap. Knowing that, He still loves us, and he still wants to have a relationship with us. Far from being a message of rejection, or that we're not good enough, the Good News of Jesus is that God doesn't care about how good we are, he WANTS us.

Home is where the heart is, Part 2:Putting in the foundation

Well, the first thing to building the house was putting in the foundation. My brother [redacted], the heavy equipment operator, borrowed a bulldozer from his boss for the weekend, and dug out the hold for me. Once that was done, all my brothers came over to put together the forms.

"Forms?" I ask.

Yeah, forms, see, you know when you pour concrete, that it's wet. It has to dry. It's the consistency of... pudding, with rocks in it. Anyway, you have to pour it into moulds, which are called forms. We built the forms out of plywood and 2x4's. At one point, I was up on the scaffolding, putting something together and [heavy equipment operator] says to me, "Can I borrow your hammer real quick?"

So, I said, "Where's your hammer? You had a hammer just a few minutes ago."

"I forgot it, it's down there." And he pointed into the hole.

"So go get it"

He says, "Keep your voice down, or [carpenter brother] will yell. He's always yelling at me, he says that I lose stuff."

"Well, you seem to have lost your hammer."

Now, by then, [carpenter] had noticed that we weren't working, and he comes over. He wants to know what the hold up is. So, I tell him [heavy equipment operator] left his hammer down in the hole, and he doesn't want to go get it, he wants to borrow mine. Boy, did he ever start yelling.

Those were the days you know, those were great days, all together, working. Those were good days.

Grandpa has a misty, far away look.

In which I explain

My post yesterday talked about the age of the term, "Christian" and how some have started to call themselves "Christ-Followers", finding that Christ-Follower has less baggage, and may be somewhat more descriptive. I want to clarify why I have decided to continue calling myself a Christian. As I noted, Christian is a very old term.

Dereck Webb sings in his song, "A King and a Kingdom,"
There are two great lies that I've heard:
"The day you eat of the fruit of that tree, you will not surely die"
and that Jesus Christ was a white, middle-class republican
and if you wanna be saved you have to learn to be like Him.


I'm not saying that there's anything wrong with being a republican. I am however saying that Jesus was not interested in political power. I am saying that Jesus said that his kingdom is not of this world. (John 18:36) I note that over the past thirty or so years, the American church has been co-opted by the likes of Pat Robertson, Jerry Falwell, and a host of others. We have been convinced that our role as Christians is to vote a certain way, and that our faith demands that we follow a certain political outlook. This has led to the detriment of the church's reputation and effectiveness. This has also enabled the fracturing of American politics.

I am a Christian. Though I respect and honor those who, for perfectly logical reasons have chosen to find a new, less encumbered label for their faith, I will maintain that I am a Christian. I do so because I will not give up the word Christian to those who want to use God's Church for their own gain, rather than for God's glory. They are charlatans, and cannot have my good name.

In which I start to rant

I have been wrestling with an idea. This will be the first elucidation of this idea, in which I define what I mean when I say that I'm a Christian. In the interim, I've been doing a bit of reading. I've read Unchristian, and GK Chesterton's Orthodoxy, both of which I highly recommend. Unchristian makes an interesting point. The book was put together by the Barna Group, who do market research for christian organizations, allowing them to taylor their approach to the population they're reaching. I've read other things as well, and when I next make it tot he library, I will be picking up Jeff Sharlet's book on "The Family", a purportedly christian organization, which believes that the ultimate expression of God is political power, not Love.

I am not comfortable with much of what has been done by "christians" or in the name of Jesus, who is Christ. Many of my generation have chosen to manage this by calling themselves, "Christ-Followers". This is a perfectly understandable choice, but not one the one that I make. If you are a Christ-Follower, I wish you all the best. However, I will continue to call myself a Christian, hoping to redeem, through a life well lived, that very old title.

Christian, is a fairly old term. Not as old as Israelite, which dates to God renaming Jacob Israel. Christian dates to the early Christian church. Acts 11:26c "The disciples were called Christians first at Antioch." Christian has been around since the early church set up shop in the city of Antioch. That places Christian at 1900 (+/- 50) years old. This is a very old name, one that I'm rather proud of. However, Christian is also a name which has been used to justify terrible things. Christianity has been used as the justification for the crusades, for the inquisition, for the cleansing of Jews from Europe during the middle ages, and all manner of other injustices. Here in the United States, Christianity was the reason for forcing the Native Americans to convert, and from time to time, raising their children in a Christian atmosphere was the justification for stealing children from their parents. Today, Christianity is the justification for saying terrible things to homosexuals.

I do not see that these things are in line with scripture. I find nowhere in the New Testament in which God encourages his people to take up arms against another nation. In fact, Paul writes that our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against spirit. Jesus says to Pilot that his kingdom is not of this world. Throughout history, it seems that christianity has been co-opted by men intent not on things of the spirit, but on gains of the flesh. Men interested in increasing their own wealth, stature, or political power, have used the name of the church, the image of Jesus, and the word Christianity as a rallying cry, and a cover. I do not find this behavior to be in line with Jesus teachings. I do not find this to be in line with scripture.

There are two verses which I have found to be good guides to my walk with God, and I now share them with you.

From the Old Testament: Micah 6:8 "He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God."

From the New Testament: James 1:22 "Religion that God our father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress, and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world."

Now, I have no illusion that on any given day, I manage to act justly, love mercy and walk humbly with God. I call days when I get one of those right, "good" and days when I get two right, "GREAT". I haven't yet managed to get all three right on the same day, so I will have to continue to rely on God's grace. In later posts, I'll go further into what it means to keep from being polluted by the world. As I look at the activities of the "christians" who seem to take up so much time on television, I keep going back to these two verses, asking, "In what way is this person interested in Justice, Mercy, Humility, and God?" or, "How is this person caring for the least and the downtrodden among us?" Though I don't get these things right on a regular basis, I am working to live them out, which is as much as I can do for the present time. I believe that this is the basis of being a Christian. This is what I want associated with the name Christian. That's what I'm working toward.

Home is where the heart is. Part 1.

Well, my time in the army ended, and I got shipped back home. I got to come home to your grandmother, and to good old [redacted]. After a few years at home, I decided that it was time for us to have a house. We had rented an apartment, but it was time for us to have a house of our own. So, I talked to my brothers. Now, my oldest brother was an electrician, and the next one down was a carpenter. My brother [redacted] was a heavy equipment operator. He used to be a real crackerjack with a crane. In fact, over the lunch breaks, he would take a split bucket, do you know what that is? A split bucket. It's this digging bucket you can put on the end of a crane. It has these jaws that scissor open, and you use it to dig. He used to put a coke bottle in the lot, and he could pick up that coke bottle with the split bucket, he'd pick it up without breaking the glass. In fact, he used to bet guys a dollar that they couldn't do the same. He made a lot of money that way, on his lunch hours.

Anyway, I talked to my brothers, and they said that they wouldn't build a house for me, but that they'd show me how to build it. So, I found a piece of land, and I took out a construction loan, and I started working. I'd work all day at [local chemical company], then I'd go to the house, and I'd work until it got dark. Once it got dark, I'd turn on my car's headlights, and finish up whatever I was doing. I'd work over the weekends, and I worked over my vacations, and after a while, I had the house all put up.